I used to think I knew it all. Or at least that I knew what was usually best. I had a long list of “I would never”s when it came to parenting. I believed that the right choice was always easy to make. Then one day I realized that I had done all of the things I told myself I wouldn’t, at least once. I have made mistakes over and over and over. There is no room for me to judge.
I now find myself constantly repeating the phrase, “Never say never.”
I realize that life is not always as simple as we imagine it to be. The answers are not always black and white, especially when it comes to parenting. Different children need and want different things.
Unfortunately, the hard truth is that we judge automatically. We don’t always mean to cringe at others’ choices, but it happens sometimes. I think the important thing is that we stop ourselves in those moments and truly place ourselves in their shoes. What might they be going through? How can I quiet my unhelpful thoughts and be supportive? How do I really want to think of other people?
I have had immense struggles and triumphs with parenting. I don’t have any desire to judge other parents anymore because I know how tumultuous it can be. We are all juggling a million different things. Life is so much nicer when we focus on how we can help others rather than on how they are struggling.
