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When Girls’ Night Out Becomes Moms’ Night Out

When Girls’ Nights Out became Moms’ Nights Out, many things changed for us moms. Between our new roles, new looks, and new awareness, it’s impossible to approach going out in the same ways we once did. I wish I could say that motherhood is the reason I attend social events late, inconsistently, or not at all, but I can not place the blame solely on my status as a mother. Some of those habits began before that. I can, however, claim that “going out” has taken on many new concerns and frustrations that I never experienced as a twenty-something college girl. 

10 Ways Motherhood Changed Girls’ Night Out:

  1. Happy Hour oftentimes means snacks rather than drinks. Obviously, there are seasons for this, but pregnancy or breastfeeding can really put a damper on your Happy dreams. 
  2. Curfew depends on caretaking tasks such as nursing, bedtimes, or your favorite babysitter’s schedule. This also extends to lunch dates that you now have to cut short for precious nap schedules or school pickup times. 
  3. If I do something to stain or wrinkle any piece of my outfit on my way out the door, I will most likely be going out with said stain. Ain’t nobody got time to re-kiss everyone goodbye or handle someone else’s dispute (again), and walking back into the house risks both happening and making me even later than I am. 
  4. 8 o’clock invites are simply too late. Enough said. 
  5. My intake limit is much more limited. Yeah, I can Uber. But who’s getting the car in the morning? And when? What if my kids were with a babysitter somewhere else? Planning ahead is now much more pertinent. 
  6. An actual purse comes with me. I’m not just sticking my ID in my bra and hoping for the best. In this purse, you can probably find hand sanitizer, band-aids, lipstick, tissues, tampons, mace, granola bars, ibuprofen, and even extra clothing items. And I’m probably offering one of these things to some young, drunk girl in the bathroom.  
  7. Apparently my mom friends and I overdress for nights out these days. A club we recently went to made me realize tennis shoes and shorts are now socially acceptable women’s wear. Why did I suffer through blistering toes in my high-heels? Who knows. At least I had bandaids on hand. 
  8. Nights out must be budgeted now. Nights out include babysitter fees, pizza or some other overpriced takeout for the kids, and all my own bar tabs since I am longer seem to attract benevolent drink buyers.
  9. Getting ready is perhaps just as stressful, but I no longer have hours to fret or redo my hair. First attempt is usually good enough out of necessity and my going out clothing is limited to only a few options anyway. No time to waste in a state of “closet trauma.”
  10. The 5am wake-up call delivers a nastier hangover than any drink combination I could have chosen. Motherly duties resume, ready-or-not. Even when I am determined to cut loose, I’m subconsciously counting down the hours of sleep I won’t have before morning. 

Don’t misunderstand. We want to go out. We NEED to go out. Our husbands need US to go out. We may whine and stress, but nights out are good for our mother-souls. Keep inviting and keep going, mommas. It is different now, but don’t let bedtime routines or extra planning keep you from laughing and enjoying time out with some girlfriends. 

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