How many of you Mom’s out there have children of the same gender? When you found out the second, or third, or fourth was the same gender, how did you feel?
I ask because we are pregnant with our second child and we had a wonderful gender reveal party that revealed we are having our second boy! I am truly excited about this and am looking forward to meeting our second handsome little man. Though, I do have a confession…as I worked to help our son open the box to reveal the balloons, I saw the blue and I had a small amount of sadness.
It wasn’t until a few days after the party that I had my meltdown. Knowing that this would be our last child, as we have said we wanted two kids, I realized what that meant. I will not be a mom of a little girl. I will not be able to hand down to her my childhood dollhouse or the American Girl Dolls I’ve kept all these years. I will not be able to buy pretty little bows and headbands and dresses. I will not have a girl’s day with my daughter when we get older or be able to see her try on my wedding dress. It was the realization that I had to close that chapter of the family I thought I’d always have…a child of each gender, and embrace the boy mom life I will now embark on.
Of course, I could pass on my dollhouse and American Girl Dolls to our sons; there’s nothing saying they can’t play with them, but there is something different about doing that than passing them onto a little girl.
I felt guilty feeling that way because ultimately what’s most important to me is bringing a healthy baby into this world. But I came to realize that I am allowed to grieve for the girl I will not have. There will be times throughout my life that I will feel sad we didn’t have a girl, but I am confident there will be more times I am thrilled to have two boys. And if our second is anything like our first, I will be one lucky mom to have two extremely sweet, loving, loyal, and funny boys with big personalities.
Many of you may be thinking, why not just try again. Sure, we could do that… and possibly get another boy. As we all know, there is no science to what gender you will be blessed with. Even though I would love to have a girl, it doesn’t change the fact that I see our family in the future with two kids. We can provide well for two kids and give them a meaningful and hopefully great childhood. Two kids with me and my husband…that’s the dream I’ve had for as long as I can remember. That dream has just been modified to two boys.