I’ll be honest. When I first thought about writing this post, it was because I was angry and I’d planned to write it from a place of anger and fear. However, rocking my daughter to sleep and smelling her sweet baby head, I realized that anger isn’t productive; and it isn’t the example I want to set for her.
So instead, I want to tell you…
What I love about my mixed race family.
- I LOVE that my husband is a proud black man. He isn’t the exception to any rule. He isn’t white on the inside. He’s not an “oreo”. He doesn’t “talk white”. He’s able to offer a perspective different than mine so that I can better understand this diverse world and increase my capacity for empathy.
- I LOVE that my daughter is both black and white. She’s not ½ and ½. She gets to fully enjoy two cultures and offer a third perspective on the world different than mine or my husbands.
- I LOVE that I have family members that can answer my questions about race. Questions about race can be uncomfortable. When you’re family, you can talk about anything openly and honestly.
- I LOVE that we see color. We’re proud to be one of the multiple interracial couples in our extended family. It’s a prominent and celebrated part of our identities.
- I LOVE that we don’t actually have to think about race that often. We have so much more in common than the things that make us different. We’re fortunate to live in a community and to be surrounded by people that don’t give us cause to examine the role race plays in our family that often. However, when we do, I’m reminded why I’m so grateful for reasons 1-4.
I’m working on re-centering myself to come from a place of love instead of anger and fear when I talk about the things that challenge my family. I think that’s something we all have in common.