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When Birth Doesn’t Go As Planned: My Story

BIRTH PLANTwo weeks after I got married, I found out I was pregnant with my first son. We were thrilled. I have a type-A personality and I’m an educated person. I knew better than to create a specific birth plan because I didn’t want to get disappointed when it didn’t go as planned.

 

 

I was prepared for whatever happened….until it happened.

I had experienced some symptoms of pre-eclampsia, including flu-like symptoms and severe swelling. I was very uncomfortable during the last 5 weeks of pregnancy. I went to the doctor at 39 weeks and my proteins were too high and we were sent to the hospital.

I cried because I was so relieved.

We got checked innewborn Kasynto the hospital around 2pm and started cytotec overnight. At about 6am on Thanksgiving Day, we started pitocin and contractions intensified quickly and I asked for an epidural. By 9am I was 6 cm dilated. My family had all arrived by 4pm with anticipate of baby soon. Nine hours later {6pm} I was still  at 6cm.  We held off until 8pm. With  no progress the nurse called the doctor in and they recommended moving forward with a c-section.

 

By this point, I was totally exhausted and emotional. A c-section was not the plan. I cried.

I was prepped for the operation and my husband changed his clothes. I was wheeled to the operating room. My husband was asked to hold back. It was terrifying to be completely naked and strapped (literally) to the operating table with several nurses, a doctor and a student doctor bustling around. It seemed like forever until my husband joined me.

Immediately following my son’s delivery, I started shaking.  I was shaking so hard, I was moving the operating table. I felt sick to my stomach. They gave me meds to stop the shaking which made me feel like I was in a drunken state and I was in and out of consciousness. It was terrifying!

Fortunately, both my baby and I were healthy and that is what is most important. The experience was not what I planned for, even if I didn’t have a plan.

Here is what I learned….

  1. Be an educated Mom and ask questions! I don’t know if things would have played out differently if I would have asked questions. I didn’t know there were things I could have been doing to minimize symptoms of pre-eclampsia. When in the hospital, I didn’t know that every medical procedure (induction, epidural, etc.) increased the likelihood of a c-section. If I knew, I would have asked questions, I may have been able to prevent the domino effect that led to my c-section.
  2. Healthy baby and healthy mama are all that matters! Despite the fact that my experience was terrifying, we were both healthy. I had my turkey baby and within a few days, I was up walking around and soaking up motherhood.
  3. Having a baby is a big deal for Dad too! My husband was a rockstar throughout my son’s birth and I can’t thank him enough for being there for both of us. This was all new to him and he didn’t know what to do or what questions to ask. It was scary for him too, although at the time I felt as though I owned the experience and didn’t acknowledge his fears.
  4. Hire a birth doula, or have a more experienced mama there with you. My birth experience with my second son was amazing and I was in control. The doula we hired was worth every penny. I know this sounds silly but I didn’t fully understand what doulas do during my first pregnancy. Labor support is critical!
  5. Its okay to have a plan with the understanding it may not go as planned!            {haha..I can laugh now} I went into the birth experience with the goal of having a baby and understanding the biological process but not much else.

Plan! Make birthing wishes. Know what you want and what you don’t want! Have an open mind! What additional advice can you offer new moms preparing for their first birth? We would love to hear.

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