I cheated. Yup. I did it. Don’t shame me or gasp at me – trust me – it was a heart wrenching decision.
I had all intentions of staying true to my heart. To stick to my vow to continue with a lovingly productive relationship set on promises and purpose, but alas, Winans, Elder Beerman and Costco won.
That’s right. I did NOT stay home, in my pj pants, sipping on 5hr old cold coffee while organizing the tubs of clothes from my first born so they were more ‘readily accessible’ for my second born. Instead, I did the unthinkable. I went on a date. While the girls were elsewhere. With my mom-self.
Why the sudden change of heart? No reason. [quote]I needed it. That’s right, I am admitting that I did not put my children first. [/quote] Or, did I? Did my hours of productivity in relation to my own self care in fact put my kids and my husband first? Sure, I kept the piles of dishes in the sink, the laundry in the dryer, and the basement a wreck, and I never returned home until hours later. Guilt? Hmmm. Maybe initially. Yes. I had dedicated this day to nothing but pure productivity, as defined by checking off my ‘easier to do when the kids are not here’ list. I planned to sit in my yoga pants, with Spotify streaming, and my big ole water bottle filled to the brim. Nope. Didn’t happen. I was productive in a different manner. I needed to date my mom-self.
Dating our mom-selves looks different for all of us, but regardless, we all need to do it. If we can’t escape on the whim, then we need to explain to our loved ones why we need the respite, in the hopes they can help us achieve this time away. We need to see what it’s like when we take our mom-selves out for a surprise coffee, shopping, reading, hair cut, nail appointment, long walk, gym session, driving-around-just-to-drive date. This is sanity at it’s finest hour. The unexpectedness of dating your mom-self is necessary.
How did my date end up? Glorious. Did I wish there was more time in the day? Yes. Another almond milk mocha waiting for me? Duh. More clearance Nordstrom Rack shoes to browse, and never purchase? Of course. Was I excited to pick my littles up, after an unplanned day of mindless renewal? Definitely.
Try it mamas. Date your mom-self. Trust me. The entire family will benefit from your solo mid afternoon latte. It’s worth every minute.