I finally had the opportunity to watch Bad Moms and I loved the movie! In this new comedy about a Mom who has (or appears to have) a perfect life – a great marriage, over-achieving kids, beautiful home and a career – but in reality, she’s over-worked, over-committed and exhausted to the point that she’s about to lose it! This movie got me seriously thinking about my own journey in motherhood but also the day-to-day stuff. It made me question…
Am I a Bad Mom? What makes someone a Bad Mom?
The truth is that I have no idea if I’m a good Mom or a bad Mom and I’m tired of the classifications and judgment! I’m doing the best I can and that’s good enough! We live in a society where Moms are judged. Everyone has advice – Everyone has an opinion.
Some Moms feel breastfeeding is the only way to go. I formula-fed both of my boys.
Some Moms feel co-sleeping is best for their children. I prefer for my boys to sleep in their bed but sometimes we end up co-sleeping because I just can’t fight the battle in the middle of the night to take them back to their bed after they wake up.
Some Moms feel strongly about only feeding their kids organic foods. I’m happy when I get my kids to eat a few items from each food group – especially vegetables!
Some Moms feel strongly about their kids participating in every educational opportunity and prioritize a private school education. I don’t know what our plans are long term for my boys’ education but I guarantee you that they will graduate high school and I hope they will become productive and caring citizens.
Some Moms feel strongly that essential oils should be used before medications. I make every effort to keep my kids healthy and when necessary, I take my kids to the doctor.
Some Moms feel strongly about ensuring their children are in activities which will help them to be competitive in life and scholarship-eligible. I hope my boys choose to participate in 1-2 activities each season as they choose. If they want to pursue sports (or any activity) at a competitive level, we will venture down that road at that time.
Some Moms feel strongly about their kids playing outside and exploring nature and their environment. My boys love to play outside but we do plenty of indoor outings too.
There are days that my boys and I have so much fun. I engage them while still encouraging independence. I cherish every minute. I come up with creative activities that support learning opportunities. We go on day adventures and thoroughly enjoy ourselves. BUT there are days that I want to throw in the towel before 9am. There are days where I appreciate the opportunity to go to my part-time job. (gasp!) There are days that I spend too much time scrolling through various things on my phone. There are days when I get frustrated and may respond in a short-manner when my son asks for the millionth time for something he has already been told no for. There are days when I have to remind myself to take a deep breath so I don’t snap!
I think its virtually impossible to measure whether someone is a good Mom or not. Maybe the best measurement comes when our children turn into adults. In the meantime, I’m going to keep doing the best I can!
The thing is that what I’m doing is enough. I am enough! I will make mistakes and I will be successful. I will make memories with my boys. I will do everything I can to raise boys to become men who will be productive citizens who cherish their wives. I will do everything I can to raise men who are honest, generous and caring.
Let’s stop being judgmental over who is bad versus good, or who is better…
You are enough! I am enough!
My kids don’t need more than my best and my best is enough!