My littles are FULL of personality. Congeniality award winners, that know no strangers, who will help anyone by holding open the door, or just flashing the full-on megawatt smile just for standing behind us in line for the grocery store. Yet in the short seven months, my girl has been a part of this crazy life, it seems we can’t go anywhere without strangers commenting on how tiny she is for her age.
Now, she IS tiny. At almost 8 months old, she’s still in size 1 diapers, cannot yet wear shoes because her feet are just too tiny (even for newborn styles!) & can’t wear anything bigger than 3-6months without it being baggy & ridiculous looking on her small frame. Gifts bought in the age-appropriate size, just haven’t managed to be worn during the right season, but will still be adorable when she finally gets to wear them. Yes, she is small in size, we know, thanks for constantly pointing it out to us. You know what? It’s normal! Her brother was small too, his weight just one more ounce than her when he was born. Both Mommy & Daddy were small growing up. Why then, must every single person who sees her must comment on her tiny size?
We have been asked if we don’t feed her enough – yes, we regularly starve her, that okay? If she was a preemie – No, she was actually born on her due date. Then my favorite follow-up question- Are you sure? I answer with a smile, but it definitely brings out the snark in my inner mom, that wants to roll her eyes and comment on their own weight, height, anything that is generally genetic, and unchangeable.
Why as a parent is every uncontrollable thing in life somehow something others judge you on? Instead of nitpicking everything about children we come across, why are we not quicker to dish out compliments? My girl is the happiest baby & shows love to just about anyone willing to glance at her, but so often they ignore her grins & giggles because they’re busy telling me how she tiny is. She is the cutest baby, and we love our petite crowd pleaser, and I just don’t want her learning that her size and weight are what strangers see first. We are all so much more than our weight, even as babies!
Moms – it starts with us. Compliments are learned, and I know for me personally, I value my children being wonderful, kind people, and not teaching them to have body issues already at seven months. No one should have the right to question my parenting based on appearance, just as I wouldn’t go up to a stranger and comment on their weight as an adult. Big or small, I’m just concerned that my girl has a heart full of love & enough to share! I want to celebrate their uniqueness, what makes them different from their peers, and makes them stick out in a positive way- something those of all ages can learn from!